WHY IS IT SO HARD TO FIND REAL MEN ANY MORE?

By Lubomir Dimitrov MSc,

Professional Astrologer, Australia

PART 1   Part 2   Part 3                          

To Jean Parkinson, who inspired me to write this article

It is very common today to hear women from all walks of life commenting wistfully about the lack of men. Indeed, what happened to the real men? You know, the ones that are strong, clever and capable, but at the same time also caring, gentle and devoted? Where to find men that are brave and courageous, but at the same time romantic and affectionate? Or translated into modern language – where to find potential husbands that earn good money and make impressive careers, but at the same time who also would spend enough time with the kids and who would organize a romantic weekend retreat, just for the two of you? Where to look for men that are attractive, clever and sexy, but at the same time loving, committed and loyal?

More and more women around the world find it increasingly difficult to find an answer to these questions. It seems that the public consensus veers towards the verdict that most men at present cannot fit the classical description of “real” men and are becoming more and more uncommitted, egocentric and detached at best. A lot of people believe that real love that was once upon a time an attribute to the real man has been now substituted by mere lust and sheer pursuit of sensual pleasures. It is believed that men (especially young men) are becoming increasingly incapable of experiencing and showing true love towards women. As a consequence men are becoming more and more perverse to say at least.

It is unlikely that we will find a straight-forward answer to the questions above without using some of the methods used in the occult science. Astrology, for instance can be extremely useful in this respect. For those of you who read my previous article in “Universal Mind” called “The Age of Aquarius” it will be easy to grasp the concepts presented below. For those of you who haven’t, I recommend doing so before reading further.

We said in it that every 2,000 years or so, the conditions on the Earth change dramatically in order to reflect the new evolutionary impulses. On the other hand, this occurs in order to reflect the changed conditions in the human consciousness. And indeed, there is no point for the spirits to get incarnated over and over again into the same earth conditions; in this case the spirits will not have the opportunity to learn something new and they will not evolve. For this reason, the conditions on the earth change totally and utterly every 2,000 years or so.

During these periods of time (known also as Ages) the spirit gets incarnated at least twice – once as a man and once as a woman. It is difficult to draw general rules for these matters and the individual reincarnation path of one spirit may vary greatly to that of another. But, it is important to understand the main idea – that normally during each Great year (or Age) we get incarnated at least twice – once as a man and once as a woman. This is possible because the spirit itself is genderless and can be incarnated in either sex. Having said that, it is essential to note that, again, there are no strict rules here and some spirits prefer to get incarnated as women, while others are much more inclined to choose men’s bodies. I may expand on the exact reasons why this is occurring in some other articles. For now it is sufficient to mention simply the fact that certain spiritual lessons can only be learned in a particular gender, or race, or country. Therefore, if a certain spirit exhibits preferences towards one particular sex and it has been reincarnated several times one after another in its favorite gender, than it may find the switch of sexes very difficult and traumatizing when the need for this arises in its next incarnation. These tendencies are plainly and unmistakably revealed to us using astrology or some other occult techniques.

Here it is important to deviate a bit from the main topic in order to clarify something for those readers who still have their doubts about reincarnation. The necessity to remove any doubts about the reincarnation of the spirit is of especially great importance for those people who call themselves spiritual. Most people that regard themselves as spiritual know that nothing happens by chance. The fact that people are drawn to certain ideas and societies is not accidental. You probably know that you too do not read this article simply by chance and the fact that you are reading it right now is also not accidental. It clearly indicates a desire to learn certain spiritual truths. But in order to progress further it is imperative that we fully accept with our hearts and with our minds that the spirit does not die after the death of the physical body. It continues to live in the spiritual world, ruminating on the elapsed life, until it is ready for its next reincarnation and there is a suitable opportunity on the earth for it.

For the clairvoyant observer it is apparent that the patterns in every consecutive life are determined to a great degree from the deeds done in the previous one. This fact also can be confirmed scientifically through careful examination of the natal, astrological chart of the person in question, but it can also be done through other means too. In the eastern teachings the dependence in the present life on the positive or negative trends from previous lives is called karma. Thus, every single deed that we do (good or bad) does not goes forgotten into the nothingness after the death of the physical body. Quite the contrary all those deeds are summarized at the end to determine the type of life we are going to experience next. It is imperative that the reader is free of any reservations about the idea of reincarnation, because without it, it is impossible to explain most spiritual truths.

It was also pointed out in my previous article that we are now living at a critical moment in the development of the humanity, when the old Age of Pisces is about to conclude and the New Age of Aquarius is about the fully settle in. This means that starting approximately from the First World War and finishing in about another 20-30 years from now, the spirits that get incarnated in human bodies on Earth, incorporate within themselves completely new evolutionary impulses that are prominent for the new Age of Aquarius. This is necessary in order to wipe out completely the obsolete patterns typical for the old Age and to settle in the modern, innovative ways of the new planetary ruler - Uranus. This is evident in every sphere of the human life, but it is especially apparent in the relationship between sexes. Why is that so?

It is because the ideas of Uranus (the new ruler) and those of Neptune (the old ruler) concerning sexes, masculinity and femininity in general are completely at odds to each other. Neptune believes that the masculine energy of one individual has to merge completely with the feminine energy of another. In his understanding this is done through the sacred ritual of marriage and once the words “I do” are uttered, this union is supposed to be for life. This means that if necessary, the two individuals in question should live together through happiness or difficulties and if the need be, they should sacrifice their own personal freedom and sometimes even their own individuality for the sake of the family union and the well-being of their children. The church (also governed by Neptune) played a significant role in this process. The role of the church for the last 2,000 years (Neptune’s reign) was to govern nearly all spheres of life and to direct people into what was believed to be the right path. The church position in regard to the marriage was that personal sacrifices have to be made in the name of the family, the children and the social peace.

Uranus on the other hand, finds such arrangement extremely restricting and incarcerating. The keyword for Uranus is freedom and individuality and from his perspective such sacrifices are far too great. He believes that the loss of personal freedom and autonomy is too high price to pay in order to raise children or to achieve social peace. In his understanding, children can be brought up in other structures – not necessarily the traditional family model – which may be even more economical and efficient solution to the same problem. In regards to the social peace, Uranus believes that it can be achieved not trough repressing the individual, but quite on opposite – by liberating them, although keeping them together within the structure of a benevolent, world state.

Therefore, Uranus being the most inventive and original of all planetary rulers is about to invent completely different “family” arrangements which will replace the existing family model. It is quite likely that these new family units will appear very unusual and strange at first, especially to people that are stuck to the traditional, family paradigm. In the near future we may see more and more often several people living together as a family. It is not unlikely that even some form of community living will take place. Traditional gay couples are already considered by most people as quite normal from of co-inhabitance and in the future it will become more and more common. And, of course, there will be still room for the traditional scenario, where simply one man lives together with one woman, but the arrangements within the family will differ considerably from what was the case during the Age of Pisces.

To create a room for its new invented family structures, Uranus first has to wreck the existing family model, which served well for the last 2,000 years but it has now becoming extensively obsolete. This process is quite evident for everybody who has the ability to look around with unprejudiced eyes. It is indeed undeniable that the type of society in which we live today is very different to the one that our parents and grandparents used to live not so long time ago. The number of new marriages is plummeting, the number of divorces is skyrocketing and even in the few remaining stable marriages the relationship between men and women are far from “traditional”. It is likely that in another 20 – 30 years time a stable marriage as we know it today will be considered as an odd exception rather as a rule. There is bad news for those who do not like these changes to occur and want to do everything possible to revert back to the traditional family model. Since the switch of the planetary rules is inevitable, that means that Uranus is going to “win” and Neptune is going to “loose”, regardless of the fact do we like it or not.

But before we raise our hands in despair for the lost family model, let’s examine if the occurring changes are entirely negative. First of all, it will be wrong to think that the rigid family structure as we know it today was in place since day one of creation. Far from it. In fact it only existed for the last 2,000 years, which is a very short period of time in the human evolution. Before the beginning of the age of Pisces and establishing the primary role of the church in all spheres of life, things looked very differently in the previous ages.

Indeed, if we examine the sex life of the people living in the ancient Rome or Greece (the Age of Aries) we will find a family model built on different moral principles. It is enough just to have a look at the primary god – Zeus and examine his own married life to convince ourselves that people at those times had a completely different understanding about family and family behavior, compared to what Christians believed later. Zeus had many love adventures and a number of marriages before settling down (in a manner of speaking only) with Hera. His married life was not an easy one, chiefly because of Zeus’ philandering and Hera’s passionate jealousy. Zeus used all sorts of tricks in order to seduce beautiful women and on few occasions he did the same with some olive-skin, good-looking boys too. If he couldn’t get the object of his passion in any other way he could turn into an animal such as a magnificent swan. On other occasion when this didn’t work, he turned himself into a golden rain and then this did the trick. In the few cases when Hera decided to enjoy herself, Zeus was instantly back home complaining about the absence of his wife.

Some interesting facts from the life of ancient Greeks emerged in the movie “Troy”, screening now at cinemas. Hollywood, however, remained true to its tradition to present historical facts in a sugar-coated, easy to swallow version, aimed to satisfy the general public taste, so many interesting details of the story were omitted or twisted. For example in the movie, Helen and Paris are presented as two lovers who go against all odds in order to save their love. In reality, however, Helen was not only unfaithful to her husband – Menelaus, but she also was a not particularly caring mother, for she left behind her daughter in order to satisfy her passion for Paris. In addition, she also indicated to her lover where the treasures of her husband are, so the couple stole most of them before absconding away.

Also, the careful observer could notice that no official wedding took place as such, upon their arrival in Troy. It was enough that King Priam (played by the remarkable Peter O’Tool), the father of Paris, welcomed Helen as his own daughter and from this moment on she ceased to be the Princess of Sparta and became automatically the Princess of Troy. This was normal for the Age of Aries, but it could not happen in the Age of Pisces, which followed some 2,000 years later because the morale of the society would not allow it and because the church would definitely intervene in this case. If the same thing happened today in the Age of Aquarius, the Troy war will seem as a children’s play in comparison to the sophisticated battle in the family court between the two royal families over the family settlement and the custody of the children. Again we see that the perception of the same issues in the different Ages bear completely different overtones in what seems to be essentially the same life situations.

In short, the ancient Greeks and especially the ancient Romans were very far from the idea of marrying one particular woman and remaining faithful to her for life. This reflects the morale of the times (the Age of Aries 2,000B.C. – 0), which was very different from the morale of Christians (the Age of Pisces 0 – 2,000 A.D.). Nowadays humanity is undergoing another total re-evaluation of its morale concerning family issues (the Age of Aquarius 2,000 – 4,000 A.D.). However, this can only happen if the new planetary ruler – Uranus destroys completely the old “Piscean” family model in order to make room for the new “Aquarian” family model.

The above statement gives us a partial answer to the question: “Why is it so hard to find real men any more?” Many people, who visit me for a consultation, try to figure out what they do wrong in their personal relationships or what else is the reason why their relationships don’t work. In most cases they do not necessary do something wrong. Simply one great planetary influence is waxing and another one is waning. The changes are global and they affect not just one or two particular individuals, but all of us. In such cases, I believe that the best course of action is to step back and to look objectively at the global situation, rather then trying to blame yourself, your partner, his mother or somebody else in particular. I know that this sound impersonal and unemotional, yet detached attitude is precisely what can help these people in their predicament. When a situation like this arises, people also tend to try to find “quick fixes”, temporary solutions, which fix the situation in short term, but which then have negative effect in long term. If real men were easy to find, a lot of women would feel tempted to get married and settled for life with them within the traditional “Piscean” family model. However, this is precisely what Uranus is trying to avoid.

The old evolutionary impulse that was in operation for the last 2,000 years or so was to merge our energy completely with this of another in order to feel complete. The new evolutionary impulse is that everybody has to become complete within him- or herself, without the necessity to merge completely with another person. This is not to say that two individuals should not be together at all, but rather that two completely independent, self-reliant and autonomous individuals could merge their energies together for some length of time, which suits both of them; and not because they are dependent on each other for their survival, completeness or any other reason but because they have chosen to do so. The difference is enormous.

Since this evolutionary impulse is relatively new, a lot of people experience shock and upheaval in the sphere of personal relationship. This occurs predominantly because for the last 2,000 years most souls that have been incarnated on Earth learned how to merge their energies with those of another. Some of these souls mastered such techniques to a very high degree and are now in a position to know intuitively the needs and desires of their partner. This knowledge then can be used benevolently towards the well-being of the partner or manipulatively towards the satisfaction of the self only. In both cases, however, it is likely that they will experience a blow of destiny. This is happening because the new evolutionary impulse is that each individual learns how to create and supply their own emotional security within themselves and not through another person.

When individuals are trying to apply old methods into the new Age, they inevitably receive a shock or blow, through which they are thrown back on their own devices. Thus, through trauma and suffering the providence is enforcing the new evolutionary lesson of internal security and self-reliance.

The pattern described above is true for nearly all individuals presently incarnated on Earth, and describes forces that are beyond the ordinary human jurisdiction, i.e. forces beyond our control. In such cases, people simply experience the consequences of the global changes that Gods have decided to implement on the Earth. However, about half of the women that have problems finding real men are guilty of not complying to one of the major spiritual laws – the law of complimenting of energies. Formulated simply, this law states that in order to attract a real man, the person in question should be a real woman. We will expand on this in the second part of this article.

Go to Part 2

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